A Manual: How To Attract a Girl
Don`t try to learn how to attract a girl before you learn how to become attractive. This is not about cheesy pickup lines and this process actually require your participation, otherwise it`s not gonna work.
More information can be found at Explosive Attraction.
As you can see, attracting a girl is becoming attractive. Don`t get the idea wrong, it has NOTHING to do with your looks. The way you present yourself is the important thing. I`ll guide you through steps which needs to be done to become attractive.
Warm up your brain, prepare a pen and paper and commit to yourself that you will participate with the exercises. Ready?
How to Attract a Girl: Get Rid of the Wrong Beliefs
Most of us have wrong beliefs or assumptions about the attraction or what girls want. It`s not important, if those beliefs or assumptions are because of our moms, a relationship between our parents, bad experience with exgirlfriend, movies, recent society, media etc. The sooner you realize things could be different from what you think, the better for you.
I want you to open your mind to new things, concepts and realizations. You need to be aware of the fact that girls think and act differently than guys. Stop assuming, learn how girls really work and then act based on that.
Girls Are Attracted Only to Handsome Guys
False. Attraction for girls means something different than for guys. If a handsome guy approaches a girl, but has nothing else interesting about him, he`s out for the girl.
We choose girls just by looks, it`s our measurement of beauty. Girls are attracted to a whole integrity (personality, character) of guys. That`s exactly why you hear a lot from girls “Just be yourself”. Do not pretend you`re someone else, girls will notice that, because they`re excellent readers of body language.
How to attract a girl even if you are not Brad Pitt?
- creativity
- humor
- selfrespect
- intelligence
- ambition
- drive
- confidence
Have you ever seen a beautiful girl with a not good-looking guy? I wouldn`t believe you if you answered no. I`m even sure you have seen so many beautiful girls with not good-looking guys. How is that possible? It`s simple, those guys have a good personality and they just naturally attract girls, who are attracted to character, not to looks.
If you haven`t seen a beautiful girl with a not good-looking guy, next time you are out, look around for beautiful girls and notice how many of them have good looking or not good looking guys.
Now, let`s digg deeper for each of those qualities:
Creativity – you don`t need to be an artist, but you need to be able to deal with normal daily situations. I`ll give you an example. Let`s imagine a guy and a girl on a first date. They just left a coffee shop.
Dialogue no. 1
girl: “So, what are we gonna do now?”
guy: “I don`t know. What would you like to do?”
Dialogue no. 2
girl: “So, what are we gonna do now?”
guy: “Hey, I know about terrific place where we can borrow ice-skates and have fun. Are you in?”
In which dialogue was the guy more attractive to the girl? And do you know why? It`s because he knows what are the options, he knows how to handle the situation and he makes the decisions, so she doesn`t have to.
I know what I`m talking about, I used to be the I-don`t-know guy and it cost me 3 wonderful relationships – the girls just couldn`t handle it.
Humor – again, you don`t need to be Jerry Seinfeld or Eddie Izzard. If you feel you don`t have a humor, then develop it! Hang out with guys, who are funny (this is huge!). Watch funny tv shows, soak the humor (any known stand up comedian, Friends, How I Met Your Mother, Jerry Seinfeld, Fresh Prince, …).
You need to develop a humor. Which guy a girl would pick – the one with a humor or the one without a humor?
Humor is not about delivering jokes, girls are not interested in jokes as much as guys are. Your sense of humor is a big thing for girls according to your personality. In other words, you need to learn to not take yourself too seriously.
Selfrespect – stop feeling sorry for yourself. You are a man and you are responsible for your actions, nobody else.
How well do you know yourself? How much time you spend alone, letting your thoughts just flying in your mind? How much do you think about yourself in order to get to know yourself better?
This is not a narcism, this is about knowing your real you, without any excuses or apologies, the raw you and the things you really want/like or don`t want/like. Both of those things are extremely important, because by clarifying what you want and what you don`t, you are creating your boundaries, which form your character.
Notice the difference of the following question of a guy who
Question no. 1
guy: “… would you go out with a guy like me… sometimes…. maybe?”
Question no. 2
guy: “Listen, I like your energy and want to know you better. Which day is more suitable for you – saturday or monday?”
Intelligence – again, you don`t need to be DaVinci or Einstein. This intelligence has nothing to do with your IQ. This is about being not stupid, receptive to new ideas, opened to discussion, aware of things around you.
It`s good to have some overview of the world, but you don`t have to memorize things (like who was a prime minister of Yemen in 1993).
Do you know where is the difference between somebody who is a walking encyclopedia (remembers everything about everything) and a laid back guy from this century? 2 minutes!
Do not memorize everything, keep the space for more valuable things. It`s more important to know where to find the information you need. And today the internet is just a priceless tool!
Einstein has been asked if he knows the relationship between kilometer and mile. He replied: “I don`t know. I don`t want to waste my brain capacity on something that can be found in every second book.”
Your brain is like a muscle – the more you use it, the more stronger it gets (and it works in both directions, so make sure to practice).
Ambition – again, you don`t have to have ambition like Hitler. It`s important that you have some bigger goal than move from your mom before you turn 45. You are a man and you want to realize yourself. You want to leave a footprint of your living on the Earth. And no, a footprint of your ass in a chair in front of your tv doesn`t count!
Ambitions relate to your list of things you want. If you`ve always wanted to just get married with a beautiful woman and have 3 wonderful kids, that`s awesome. But work on that. This is not gonna happen if you`re sitting at home in that dammed chair.
Drive – it`s fine to have ambitions, but if you have nothing that motivates you to achieve your goals, you are doomed not reaching your goals. You need to find a motivation. Something, that will juice you in achieving your goals.
Confidence – so you are creative, you have a sense of humor (and you are not afraid to use it!), you have a selfrespect, you are intelligent, you have ambitions and you have a drive. By having that you must have gained a confidence as well, because if you really did the exercises and has worked with your personality for a while, you must feel the change and that change must juice you with the power of energy – confidence.
Use the following link to learn more about how attract a girl and what exercises you can do to increase all of the above mentioned qualities.
When a Girl Rejects You, The Life Ends
No. If it did, there wouldn`t be any guy left. You need to think of a rejection as a energy drink or a time management tool. I`ll explain those 3 ideas to help you understand what is possible if you reframe a situation and instead of suffering you actually gain something.
Reframe #1: Rejection is an energy drink
Do you know the old saying What doesn`t kill you makes you stronger? I`m sure you do. Well, that`s it. Don`t let rejection to spoil the fun of approaching women. Each rejection becomes less important to you and because of that you naturally change your attitude and the fact that the world doesn`t stop for you whether a girl rejects you or not actually makes you more attractive to girls.
Reframe #2: Rejection is a time management tool
Imagine you approach a girl you are attracted to, you talk for an hour, but during the hour you would find out the girl is not attracted to you. If she is letting you know she is not attracted, she has a reason for it and the reason is that she saves both of you time and energy. Now it seems to make a sence, right?
Reframe #3: Rejection isn`t about you
You need to keep this in mind. If she rejects you, it`s something she needs to deal with, not you. There could be hundreds of reasons for her rejecting you. Don`t let it bother you.
Have you ever had a bad morning and the rest of the day was just rubbish? Have you fallen on the street? Have you forgotten to do the laundry? What is your bigger turn on – short hair or long hair? See? It`s just another day in our life. It doesn`t make them less human!
Don`t forget there are more girls than guys. So continue approaching other girls.
Use the following link to read a deeper version of this article about how attract a girl.
A Manual: How To Attract a Girl
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